Thursday, January 11, 2018

成长是一个很痛的词

当你成熟了

你不一定会得到什么

却一定会失去一些东西

或许是至亲
或许是至爱
或许是挚友
或许是童真
或许是方向

又或许是你自己


Sunday, December 31, 2017

旅行的意义不在于去什么地方
而是和什么人一起去

感恩最后一次的旅程
感恩那一夜大家对彼此的坦白
令我释怀了, 想通了, 也豁达了

欢笑, 泪水, 失望, 释怀灌溉着我们的友谊
时间也给了过去的心结误会一个答案
经历得越多让我更学会珍惜这一段友谊
也学会凡事站在不同的角度反复思虑

让我相信无论所发生的一切是好是坏
都有它的意义

也许让彼此的友情更经得起考验
也许让你变得更成熟
也许让你反省反思
也许让彼此更了解对方
也许让你改变你一贯的想法
也许让你学会原谅及道歉
也或许能让你释怀放下执念
也许让你变成更好的人

我也为我曾经有意或无意做错的事, 伤人的话
献上最深的道歉

时光转瞬, 也快五年了
大学生涯也快拉下帷幕了
而我大学生涯里最美好的风景, 就是遇见你们

谢谢你们陪我成长
谢谢你们陪我度过蜕变和寻找自我的旅途
谢谢你们留下最难忘的回忆
谢谢你们对我的包容
谢谢你们让我变得更坚强

感恩有你们 #C163


Sunday, November 26, 2017

偶爾還是很喜歡這個小小的心靈出口

把無法言明的感受
把無法分享的優美詞句

細細記下


分享文字的唯美會常被人
誤解成多愁善感, 愁雲籠罩

但其實又有多少人明白
欣賞文字的優美, 離殤, 深度
也可以是一種愛好


Friday, November 24, 2017

At some point I do hope that I dont know
what exactly I want in life

Knowing what you want can be terrifying and stressful

You are terrified if any single detail doesnt
work out the way you planned

You are terrified that you might not
achieve what you want ultimately

You are terrified that you might be
doing something you dont prefer for your entire life

But you just cant let go of your dreams
dont you?
When you tried your best but you dont succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you cant sleep

Stuck in reverse


But if you never try you'll never know

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

I will try to fix you

Thank you Coldplay for such an amazing song
that never fails to heal me whenever failure hits
"more effort is needed"

and it just hurts. A lot

Are you the right person to judge that my effort isn't sufficient
for so many sleepless night

My favourite quote used to be
"Hard works pay off, no doubt"

And well I questioned myself If I have exerted sufficient effort
Am I not trying hard enough?

or I'm just unlucky after all

I'm just so tired of trying so hard sometimes
But well, how can I stop trying?

Definitely I wouldn't achieve what I want for sure if I stop trying


Wednesday, November 22, 2017

人生很短

别困在人生循环的迷宫里

逐梦没有恐惧, 没有借口, 没有下次

有时候人生缺的就是些义无反顾

让我们一而再地说下次吧


Monday, November 13, 2017

I stop trying too hard in everything that I once struggled with

What's meant to be
will always find its way

Counting down the days
 and I cant wait to leave, to drift

#195 days

Thursday, August 31, 2017

生命终将消逝

徒留一颗破碎的心

- Mycroft Holmes

Sunday, August 6, 2017

一杯咖啡
一次背包窮遊
一場自然醒的睡眠
一首值得單曲循環的歌
一本讓你沉墜入玄思的好書
一幅平復你內心喧囂不安的海景

當個容易滿足的人
當能讓你快樂的事無法用金錢衡量
就會得到最平凡無華的快樂

就讓浮華都成空, 執著都隨風


Monday, July 24, 2017

你活在狭小的生活里
连难过都是一种奢侈

谁不知正能量是精神粮食
但什么时候人生低潮時,
难过低落也变成了一种错误


Monday, June 26, 2017

如果说我害怕吗
其实内心当然害怕

如果说我舍得吗
其实内心当然舍不得

需要放弃的很多
需要割舍的更多

放弃已在囊中的知名公司job offer
放弃毕业后前2年的黄金工作时光
放弃我想经营的人事物
放弃我五年来的坚持

梦想的代价那么大
到头来还是否值回票价?
我不可置否

但我坚信我不会后悔自己做出的决定

逃跑计划1.0, 倒数10个月

#筑梦.逐梦

Monday, May 1, 2017

有没有一种歌手

让你听了他的歌曲

心里逐渐变得安宁


奔驰在大道上

满脑子的思绪和感触

却在我第一次播放了这张专辑的瞬间

等到了所谓的平静


仿佛时间因为他的歌声而静止

默默地倾听他想诉说的故事


秋:故事 - 苏打绿

Sunday, March 5, 2017

理想和现实总存在着距离

年少时把对理想的热忱暂交给现实

热爱自己的工作, 把每一段挫折当作磨练

待有能力以后再续自己的理想

我是个未来的审计师

我的心里有着作家梦

我热爱我的工作

我对我的理想的热忱也未曾灭

Friday, November 4, 2016

我也害怕, 时间会说真话
让我的坚持变成一个笑话

Saturday, September 24, 2016

今夕何夕

青草离离

明月夜送君千里

等来年,秋风起

再见

Thursday, July 21, 2016

我想...即使是聒噪的人

也能把某个秘密藏在心底最深处
从来不告诉任何人

即使那段回忆并不美好
却非常深刻

惋惜回不去的从前
才会把那份情感牢牢禁锢在人心里

只要心里还存在一丝念想
只要银行卡号依然是某个不变的生日日期
只要手机依然存着那个不会再拨打的电话

无论身旁的人已来之又去, 不断变换
就算心曾倾注在另一个人身上
即使桃花依旧人面全非

如果某天...
突然听见某段熟悉的旋律
忽地睹见非常相似的面孔
无意间翻查旧手机时看见数年前的短信

都会唤起记忆中挥之不去的那个人
也许这并不叫執念, 只是潜意识无法抹去的遺憾


Monday, April 11, 2016

遗憾地, 我并不是那种

在个每一次失败后还能拾起勇气和信心继续前进的人

然后在疲乏不堪,伤痕累累后

会发现其实并不再期待靠岸了

因为彼岸如此遥远

而身在看不见边际的茫茫大海中央

漫无目的地漂流

不想再挣扎寻找救生的浮标

不想在仰望南方十字星作为方向标寻找彼岸

只愿沉默地漂流

等待漂流的尽头

《漂流 。彼岸》

想起苏打绿的一首歌
《当我们一起走过》

“我 在旷野漂流
漂流的尽头 就是你爱的宽容“

也许漂流的尽头早已尘埃落定

我们所需要做的只是安守本分

等待我们所期盼的尽头, 落脚的彼岸


Monday, April 4, 2016

你知道为什么文字有那么独特的魅力吗

因为它是隐藏感受的方式
因为它是所有情感的出口
因为它能替我们保守秘密
因为它能让我们不说一句话就宣泄心底最深处的感触

从前我总认为情感唯一的出口是向他人倾诉
相互倾诉的同时信任并在乎对方

但不知为, 渐渐地我才学会了隐藏

学会隐藏自己的秘密
学会独享自己的喜怒哀乐
学会在文字里细细品味心里的感受

也许事发的那一刹那你很希望与人分享来抒发情绪
但有时一觉醒来发现其实已经没有与别人分享的必要了
也避免把自己的烦恼和负能量转达给别人

无聊时躺在床上拿出手机再次阅读自己的日记
也是一件幸福的事
因为你成功度过了那些难熬的时刻

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

曾经总是很在意一些关于自己与好友不实的流言蜚语

但庆幸有人点醒我

相信你的人自然无需解释也会相信你
这是无声的给力

不相信你的人心里已对你抱有一种先入为主的偏见
再解释对他们来说也只是强词夺理
何必浪费唇舌, 越描越黑 =)



Sunday, December 20, 2015

友情里
他人需要接受的是你原有的潜在性格
并非需要接受你的一切缺点恶性

潜在性格坚定无比
若非生命中发生让你感概无限的事
让你领悟其中道理
是无法改变的

而缺点恶性则犹如戒不掉的毒瘾
明知伤身却总是重蹈覆辙
若你真正把一个人当朋友
你会愿意为彼此的舒适而改掉恶习并自我提升

友情, 不是包容一切接受所有
而是互相磨合期间因为彼此成为更好的人


Sunday, December 13, 2015

这是三个人的故事

一个充满正能量的话多乐天派
一个爱说大道理的负能量奇葩
一个老当中间人缓和气氛的和事老

从一开始相识,我浑然不觉得我们三个能有任何共同话题可言
不同科系, 不同音乐层次, 不同性格, 
不同理念 不同生活态度, 不同取向
但到后来只要共处一室, 怪话题就会源源不绝地冒出来
而就算咱们不说话也不感到尴尬


我想我会怀念这段日子关在凌乱音乐室练乐器的日子
碰咚锵的爵士鼓声, 叮叮咚咚的钢琴声, 铛铛的古筝响
偶尔有一句没一句地搭着话, 偶尔无视, 偶尔自言自语

独自在音乐室练琴的我会不禁感概
虽然平时练习时, 我们的旋律都凑不成块
但对我来说少了任何谁都感到特别空洞

我想我也不会忘记那顿考试前最后的晚餐
四道奇怪的菜肴
开不了盖的ABC汤料
闻所未闻的老抽苦瓜午餐肉
淡而无味的苦瓜蛋
肉桂香泛滥的Ponteh鸡

谢谢你们为我这学期添上
另类
反常
怪异
却美好
的回忆
=)


Thursday, November 19, 2015

我的生活
总在许许多多的顾虑当下
日复一日缓缓前行

极少鼓起勇气跳出自己的comfort zone
因为没勇气去触碰而无法摆脱自己心里那块灰暗地带
从来不肯为自己最深层的渴望冒险一次

人生需要考虑的前因后果太多
总是羡慕那些放纵自己内心情感随心所欲的人
艳羡那些跟着感觉走的人

因为我是一个最典型的,
害怕承受失败, 害怕被抗拒,
害怕未知未来, 害怕面对负面结果
的废材 =)

Saturday, October 3, 2015

我人生中的20年

都扮演着循规蹈矩, 拒绝冒险, 安分守己的角色

典型的害怕失败, 害怕承受后果, 害怕抗拒, 害怕未知未来的废材

但心中那股令我自己也感到讶异的坚定和勇气告诉我
 
你人生中发生了仅有的例外

一个意想不到的例外

请你不要留下任何遗憾


Monday, August 3, 2015

你的信仰
你的梦想
你的方式
不一定能得到所有人的认同

但只要给你自己一次机会
一次努力追求梦想的勇气
过你想要过的生活
实现你想要的梦想
成为你想要成为的人

每个人看待梦想的代价都不同
至少我认为就算再苦再累再忙碌
但我的生活不会留下任何遗憾
光是想想你梦想得以实现的时候
会多么满足和快乐
 就已足矣 =)
 

Friday, July 17, 2015

我找到了我大学生涯里的第二个归宿
第一个归宿是给了我那么多机会的Music Club
让我尝试了许多不同职位, 也让我办起了華樂

華樂团就像家
看见大家全心全意, 无怨无悔地付出
不计较收费, 出钱出力
劳师动众到处找人帮忙和借乐器

为了我们的首次演出,
牺牲了多少个夜晚和周末回来练习
甚至翌日有考试也不惜留下练习

还有instructor们...
不计酬劳, 每星期义务帮忙训练新生
最重要的还是循人独中的学生指挥Jun Min
不收分毫, 义务帮我们借谱..借乐器..远道而来帮忙指挥

谢谢你们陪我撑起可说是一无所有的華樂
没有经费, 乐器短缺也陈旧得可怜,乐手也寥寥无几
如果你像我看见他们那么努力
你也会像我一样感动...

因为你们, 让我对我的选择更加坚定
我对成立華樂的坚持和努力并没有白费
谢谢你们无私地付出
永远不会忘记大家的这份情缘





Friday, November 21, 2014

20 November 2014 Thursday


还有两星期就考试了
但Music Club Member都在为MusicPartnerChallenge疯狂
我和我的team也为了这challenge献丑了 hahah


今天录制我们的第二支影片
有种好久没那么开心了的感觉
真的发自内心的快乐

音乐带给我的快乐
唱歌带给我的快乐
Scott倩旭阳钱team带给我的快乐 =)

#musicpartnerchallenge

Sunday, August 31, 2014

“这一路走来
我搞丢了许多东西..."

你是否曾经迷惘
你如今最重要的朋友是谁
谁又把你当做最重要的朋友

第一个出现在你脑海的人
也许那人已经不复存在
或是他们有了新的生活新的朋友圈子
掰开指头数一数,怎么陈年往事就如昨天一般
时光却让这些美好一个都不留


苦日子熬过来的友谊
真的很可贵
我想起初中时期和老婆下课时总在电脑室后
那段日期很苦, 初中时期我也没什么朋友
直到高中才认识了V1 kaki

我想起foundation时期和ChaiMei, Viviana, Daphne共度的难关
那段日子很苦, 因为PJ房东都很刻薄
茶餐室很远, 宿舍很闷热, 也没有网络
每天早上起床都得担心今天是不是有没巴士上课
周末都得走20分钟的路途到学校去考试

我想起V1时期
没有任何纷争的时期
很纯粹的每到一个人的生日自动收钱庆祝生日的时期
任何佳节一定一起举办一起庆祝的时光


也许大学过程里认识人很重要
但那些人大部分最终只会沦落为hi bye friend
只有少数会成为真心朋友
你会渐渐接触到现实社会, 相互利用, 砸钱
也许那就是成长的定律


一直渴望大学校园生活的你
期待成长蜕变的你
会怀念当初没有利益, 淳朴, 最真实的友谊

Saturday, May 10, 2014

很难过

当我看见final sem成绩数学那一栏
我的心在往下坠
坠到谷底
那种失望难以形容

明明是准备最久最充分的科目
还蛮有把握..考题都做完的情况下
为什么却是所有科目里最低grade?

一年来的努力都白费了
3.86 cgpa
就只差那区区的0.03...
只因为一个科目
我挥别了full scholarship
剩下half scholarship

appeal for review examination result
但许多senior都说机会很渺茫
现在除了等学校回复,没什么可做的了...

心很空
好像被挖了一块


Friday, April 25, 2014

packing my luagage preparing to go home!

I miss my friends

never meet up for months already

and I will miss Pj too...

my roommates, my hostel, 
our favourite place to lepak...
ss2 food court, kimchiharu, tropicana mall,
pasar gerai, pasar malam, bazaar...

bye foundation, bye pj T.T


Friday, April 18, 2014

I really wonder why

throughout 3 sem in foundation

I do well in subject that I hate the most instead of subject Im interested in

hmm...seems legit?


Saturday, April 5, 2014

如何让我遇见你,
在我极为渺小的时刻,
皆因你开朗豁达的性格及笑声;

如何让我熟识你,
在我软弱无助的时刻,
皆因你身临其境的耐心倾听;

如何让我了解你,
在我辨清黑白的时刻,
皆因你毫无保留的坦诚倾诉;

如何让我误解你,
在我内心矛盾的时刻,
皆因你我强势的意见相冲;

如何让你我释怀,
在你我最美好的时刻,
皆因知己是永恒的感动。


生日快乐朋友


Thursday, March 20, 2014

too much assignment, too much test,
nobody is there to lessen my burden in group assignments

too stress, last sem syllabus is kind of new and overload

dont feel like leaving my roommates,
fear of adapting to new situation in degree,
afraid that my friend might not be able to pass this sem and go sungai long with us

but feel like leaving foundation,
leaving this factory-like-campus,
leaving all the shit that stressed me out here behind

so contradicting....

I hate changes, I hate adapting to new situation
I prefer consistent and peaceful life like what I have now,
hoping I can be with my roommates until I graduated



Sunday, March 2, 2014

1 March 2014 Saturday


I'm so exhausted...sleep for less than 5hours in 3days
and after having mid term, went to Sungai Long to view houses


but the good news is...Today is OUR day! =D
Finally we found a nice and cheap hostel at Sungai Long

all our effort...by travelling all the way from PJ to Sungai Long is worthy =)
we stand for like 3.5hours to reach our destination /.\
including waiting public transport...standing in ktm, lrt and bus
not sure why is it so crowded during weekend
feels like suffocating in KTM




and I freaking survived this week...
fall sick while having 2 mid term test and 1 proposal to submit
plus trial on cooking foods that we going to sell in flea market next week

I thought I'd just doom my exam
too dizzy to study and having time constraint
but so far so good...I'm feeling ok with my mid term test
while everyone is telling me...doomed doomed doomed
not sure if I'm doing well or I just don't give a shit on my result anymore sigh


I just wish that I can rest well now
but there's still assignment draft to submit on next tuesday and test on saturday

and we still have to operate our store during flea market 
for the next whole week
waking up 4AM in the morning to prepare and cook...
then joining classes and stay back late up to 5PM


seriously....
I'm dying for a rest

sem 3... why you so jialat?!


Wednesday, February 12, 2014

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Tuesday, February 11, 2014

如果能够重新再来一次

我希望V1 kaki能回到当初美好的时光

-新年快乐- 2014



















Thursday, January 23, 2014

20 January 2014 Monday


went to stay at one of my roommate's house in Malacca during Thaipusam break
we stayed there for 3days and 2nights


a special trip to Malacca compared to my previous trip
weather is so freaking cold...
unlike typical Malacca trip...to A'famosa, Church St.Paul, Holland Red House

we went to the outskirt of Malacca instead of town area
and I found Malacca is really a good place for retirement


Day 1
we took bus to Malacca from TBS
a long long trip...we spent 5hours to reach Malacca

we reached Malacca around 6PM...and went to Jonker Street
Jonker Street is very different from the last time I came to Malacca

the food is soooooo cheap and special
ever heard dry wantan mee without kicap? durian cendol? coconut shake? durian puff?
sounds weird but delicious (y)




chou tofu and durian puff


Day 2
went to Pantai Puteri and a ship workshop owned by relative of Chaimei
enjoying the sea breeze...walking down the beach...playing with dogs

and this is the first time we learn how to drive a motorboat
our coach is a 13 years old boyboy hahah










Day 3
our last day in Malacca...
we baked chocolate chips cookies for CNY
really really delicious 

Sad life we have...
still got classes on the next day, Bye Malacca
nice trip and the best memories with le roommates =D

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

小时候
我们总会贪心地许下一筐罗的愿望
我想要...我想要...我想要...

越老...许下的愿望却越来越简单
因为我们的愿望...不再是金钱所能衡量
我们有太多的后悔...太多的抱歉...太多的遗憾...太多的失落
我们不能倒流时光, 我们不能篡改历史

今年的我...和知己们在璀璨的烟花下许下最简单的愿望
我希望身边的人和我自己幸福快乐...健健康康


Friday, December 20, 2013

20 December 2013 Friday


fuyoh~~ final exam is over
I've put in all my effort for final 
hoping to score 4.0 for this semester =)

went to celebrate with colleague at neway right after exam

and lepak lepak at Tropicana mall with roommate at night

we watched Frozen..it was awesome, really really funny and cute
especially Olaf kakaka

3 of us laugh like shit in cinema
x da image langsung...tsk tsk


Bye Sem 2
Happy Holiday!
Looking forward to last sem in foundation

Friday, December 13, 2013

Study mode on = Bat mode on

Roommate's and my life is perfectly upside down

Sleeping time = 11AM - 4PM
Meal = 5PM
Study = 6PM - 11PM
Nap = 11PM - 1AM
Shower - 1AM
Study = 2AM - 11AM

freakin healthy lifestyle

Just wanna get rid of final exam asap
and get back to my normal life =(


Saturday, December 7, 2013

Sick of people who look down on you?

dont blame them
stop letting them to bring you down

give them a reason

why they shouldnt... =)


Monday, December 2, 2013

2 December 2013 Monday


I'm writing this post...to show my appreciation towards my drama team
you guys are awesome...really really awesome


The moment when our tutor praise us...for acting well
and the moment we end our drama...the round applause by the audience

I'm really happy today...
from deep down of my heart


thanks guys for co-operating well in the live show of our drama
we did it better alottttt during the live show than our rehearsal

The scene when CK shed his tear...
The scene when I'm hit by Daniel...
The scene when the money flew all over the room and CK slapped me...
Its really awesome, and unforgettable...


we are lucky that we met groupmates who willing to "sacrifice" their image =P

it doesn't matter if we make mistakes in our sketch outline
for me, we have done our best, and we deserve the compliment by our tutor


Special thanks to EC and Scott..for the recordings

and thanks to my friends, ck's and dn's friends for staying back to watch our drama,
u guys really make me felt confident as I see familiar faces in the audience seats

Thanks you guys...best drama team ever =)!

Saturday, November 16, 2013

我想放开过度执着的一些梦想
肩上背负着越来越沉重的梦想真的很难受


mid term的其中一张paper我做得并不是很好
除非能在final exam或者assignment做得非常好...
否则在mid term区区丢掉了的3分已经足以让我的degree奖学金减半

考完那张paper后, 我已经不断地在幻想着我这个sem无法保持在3.9GPA的情况
甚至连睡觉都做了degree无法继续领奖学金的噩梦...
心情是难以形容的失落和难过


我想我真的需要减压减压...

Friday, November 1, 2013

终于...今天我们就离开了刻薄房东房子

有种解脱的感觉

我希望我能在新房子住得开心, 没烦恼, 没压力

我唯一舍不得的是我那时常说梦话, 很38的室友
收拾后, 我留下一只公仔, 一张我们共用的印花卡, 共用的mahjong paper

收拾着真的有点难过, 房里空了一块
衣柜里空了一半, 书架上空了两层, 衣柜上的行李箱少了两个
仅仅相处了半年...我们却有那么多共用的东西 T.T

别忘了我们草泥马的约定, 周末来我们新宿舍过夜


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

21 October 2013 Monday


I feel a sense of accomplishment after my public speaking...
my most successful presentation ever =)

the first time I able to transmit all information to my audience
without peeping at paper and I'm not really nervous
perhaps I'm talking about my favourite topic?

which is --
Demonic Possession, Paranormal
Just because we never experience it, doesn't mean they doesn't exist...


But I'm facing difficulty when I wanted to practise at hostel
I liked my slideshow but I feel so creepy to look at it alone =_=











Tuesday, October 15, 2013

 12 October 2013 Saturday


Asian Cultural Society Camp

le gang first experience - first time participate in station game
quite fun and enjoy although we all aren't in the same team =D

especially "king searching" game and "fear factor"!



although we didn't manage to get into top 3
but I'm glad to know a few new friends from other campus
purple team ftw~